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I think almost everyone wants to have a special formula to solve problems. And this time Dale Carnegie shares one method with us that he discovered on his journey finding solutions for worry. There isn’t a magic trick behind it, but this method can help you to overcome worry and stay calm.
He figured out that the worst feature about worrying is that it destroys our ability to concentrate and to think. Whenever we are stressed and worried out thoughts are just crazy, here and there and we can’t think clearly about the situation. So the tip he gives us is to accept the worst that can happen. When we accept the worst that could possibly happen, we have nothing more to lose! And that means – we have everything to gain!
“Yet millions of people have wrecked their lives in angry turmoil, because they refused to accept the worst; refused to try to improve upon it; refused to salvage what they could from the wreck. Instead of trying to reconstruct their fortunes, they engaged in a bitter and “violent contest with experience”-and ended up victims of that brooding fixation known as melancholia.“
Dale calls the formula that can help us to solve our worry “the old Willis H. Carrier formula” that says:
1. Ask yourself: „What ist he worst that can possibly happen?
2. Prepare to accept it if you have to.
3. Then calmly proceed to improve on the worst.
So whenever we find ourselves in a stressful situations where we think everything is horrible and hopeless, we have to accept the worst that can possibly happen. For instance, if you think you will fail, because you are soo worried and stressed that you might be bad at the test, you have to accept that you can fail. But then, by accepting it you can remind yourself that you can repeat the test. You also can say you studied hard and did everything. So even if you fail you know it didn’t have anything to do with you learning not hard enough. Maybe then you will find out what went wrong and what expects you next time. By doing that you should feel more calm because you know, you will survive it and you know what will happen if you really fail.
I’ve tried this method and it really helped me. Because whenever you are worried you can’t see any light and think that’s the end of the world! So when we accept the worst we have more room to think because you already accepted it. And you will find a solution or thoughts that were clouded by worry. Whenever I get in stressful situations I always try to apply this method so it will calm me down.
I hope this formula will help you too! Of course it is easier said than done but I think everyone can find the right technique to use this formula. I know you always have to remind yourself of those kind of things when you are worried. But the more you try it out and apply it to your situation the more you get used to it and you feel much stronger in every other situation.
So stay tuned if you want to hear more about Dale’s tips!
Have a nice day everyone!
~mako